“…and if I asked you to name all the things that you love…how long would it take for you to name yourself?”
To love someone, to truly love another, you must first love yourself. Every single self-help book, every therapist, every motivational speaker says a version of these words. But somehow, it seems easier to ignore them.
It seems easier to get up in the morning, avoid looking into my own eyes in the mirror, stuff down the hard work of looking lovingly into my own heart, and get on with my day. I head out into the world, being kind to strangers, trying to make a difference in the world, getting a lot of shit done. But there is always a silent tug that I can only hear when I pause, and get quiet.
And there it is…
The quiet pull of my heart, wanting to be heard, seen, forgiven, accepted unconditionally, and just loved…by me.
“How do we love ourselves? It is as difficult at times as seeing the back of your head. It can be as elusive as it is necessary. I can only say that loving yourself is like feeding a clear bird that no one else can see. You must be still and offer your palmful of secrets like delicate seed. As she eats your secrets, no longer secret, she glows and you lighten, and her voice, which only you can hear, is your voice bereft of plans. And the light through her body will bathe you till you wonder why the gems in your palm were ever fisted. Others will think you crazed to wait on something no one sees. But the clear bird only wants to feed and fly and sing. She only wants light in her belly. And once in awhile, if someone loves you enough, they might see her rise from the nest beneath your fear.” ~Mark Nepo
To me, the secret is this. Loving myself means looking beneath the layers I have taken on over the years. It means looking beyond physical appearance, gender, titles, accomplishments, possessions, even personality traits. And under all of that, is this ME, that is really just a beautiful part of WE.
You’re there too, under it all. Can we get a glimpse of that today?
